Wake up soon.

I somehow want to ask some more, like how or why or what could happen next. I am not sure too if out of curiosity or concern or courtesy, but I just feel like I need to ask. But I don't, I have to hold my questions back. So many sad and painful things have happened to my close friends lately, and a complete stranger suddenly being very sick burdens my heart too much already that I want to be contented with just praying for her and shutting off my head to knowing how exactly things happened. And I feel guilty somehow, because I feel selfish somehow. But not wanting to understand the bad situation doesn't lessen by any tiny bit my hoping for a better situation. I know the fear and worry and panic there are in possibly losing a dearly loved one (the most, actually), it is a very painfully ugly thing. But I know also the joy and gratitude and relief there are in the life only the miraculous God can give, it is amazing beyond words. I hope not to be alone talking about these things. So to you, stranger, forgive me that I spare my heart today from your painful story. I pray you will get well soon.